I found St Christopher’s medallion, today.
The medallion has been missing for 3 days, and I went through a journey to find it.
It suddenly returned when I wasn’t looking and didn’t expect it.
Local surfers wear the St Christopher medallion for courage, athletic strength, and protection, and it has hung over my kitchen sink through the challenges of the pandemic, a reminder every day of praying for God’s guidance, protection and blessings.
St. Christopher carried a child across the water, who seemed heavier with every step, and when the saint got to the other side, the child told Christopher that He was Christ, bearing the weight of the world.
That’s why the child was so heavy.
What Was the Meaning?
Last week I walked into the kitchen and the medallion was gone, the chain simply hanging, loose at both ends, over the sink.
I felt shock, momentarily, and questions. This didn’t seem good.
What did this mean??
Where did it go?
Is there a danger?
Is there something to do?
I decided to imagine that the medallion was present, hovering ‘in the air’, unseen but still present; the meaning still active; a physical representation of what is in my heart - trust and faith in God and Divine protection in my life and for family and home.
Days went by and every day in the kitchen I affirmed my faith in God’s protection, in the guidance I receive, and that everything is okay.
The world around me carries on.
But I wanted the medallion.
Searching and Questing
I searched the floors to no avail. It might be in the sink disposal, but a flashlight wasn’t revealing anything. I was worried about turning it on and somehow mashing up the hidden medallion. I called maintenance.
Luis searched the disposal and found nothing. But, the bathroom sink needed unclogging, and he went to get tools, and I asked him to bring an industrial vacuum cleaner.
Luis reminds me of my grandfather.
I vacuumed up what seemed like years of gunk (from repairs and previous tenants) from under the cabinets and appliances, and he wrestled the pipes and got some years of gunk of them, too. I learned that there is a small patch of black mold under the sink that needs addressing.
Luis moved on, he had 4 more units to work on and it was 4pm already.
Everything was a mess and then everything was nice and clean.
The energy at home feels lighter.
There’s a repair to be made. But no medallion.
The Black Dragon in My Dreams
This morning, in the dreamtime, there was a large, fat, aimless, needy black dragon in my dreams.
It wanted to be with me.
No, I’m done with that old gunk.
I’m done with the critical voices, from childhood, or other experience.
I’m done with carrying the weight that isn’t mine, with the heaviness of expectations of times past, of offers that drag me down.
I’m surprised at this feeling, that I don’t care.
It feels like freedom.
There’s no more attachment, no more ability to suffer manipulation, in this way.
Medallion Discoveries
For many years I’ve felt unfairness and an overwhelming sense of responsibility.
It turned out that I had a huge responsibility, but then I had to bear it all alone, and that was the unfairness. The injustice.
Why did it have to be this way.
At the beginning it was clear, I could focus selfishly and do what I wanted. That seemed like freedom but intuitively it felt fraught with mysterious pitfalls.
Or, I could take on the responsibility and do it to the best of my ability.
I took on the responsibility.
I’ve had many tears over why were things this way, how could things have been different. But they aren’t different. They are what they are.
It turned out there were people who showed up and we helped each other, the entire time.
This is the discovery I learned from the medallion, disappearing:
I thought it was unfair, but I was blessed to overflowing by supportive Soul family.
I thought it might be too much but at the very end I received unexpected help.
I sense I did a good job; that is between me and God.
I’ve become better, stronger, more resilient, and dare I say wiser.
In so many ways I have been blessed and protected.
So I’m grateful to take this moment, to acknowledge the incredible blessings, the incredible love, the incredible experience of taking on responsibility, learning to do a good job, making mistakes and course correcting, getting it done.
Anything else - that I did or thought or didn’t do, that anyone else did or thought or didn’t do - no longer matters.
Finding the Medallion
Back in the kitchen this morning, tidying up, I decided to put the lids on the glass storage containers in the cabinet, that usually had the medallion hanging below it.
Lo and behold, as I reached up to take them off the shelf, I saw something.
One of them contained the medallion.
It was sitting, safely nestled between two pieces of glassware.
I had a laugh at how it could have gotten there.
It somehow ended up off the chain above where it had been hanging, inside the cabinet, inside glassware.
So I guess it was hovering, unseen, above me.
It’s hanging on the wall now, at the counter, next to the stove.
The wall that had the gas in it and that did not catch fire. (Story link below)
Feeling Grateful
I have a sense of completion.
After the disappearing, and affirming faith, and the cleaning, and the dragon dream, it all somehow has meaning, even if it’s hard to give voice to what that is.
I know that I’m alright.
I know that everyone else, is alright.
I am grateful, and life moves on.
Love, Susan Inspired
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Have courage. Take Heart.
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If you liked this article, you may also enjoy this story -
Protected by Divine Guidance: A Story
This is an incredible story of an event that happened this week. All was well, because I followed Divine guidance for me, and that kept me safe!
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Art Notes:
1. St Christopher Medallion by Susan Inspired
2. Saint Christopher Carrying the Christ Child by Jacob Jordaens done between 1625-1639 (public domain).